WGM Weekender: The Great Miami Summer Exodus, Who Goes Where & Why.
Tell us your zip code, we'll tell you your summer - neighborhood by neighborhood
The Weekender: A Field Guide to the Great Miami Summer Exodus
The most annoying question in Miami doesn’t start in summer. It starts in March.
You’re at a dinner. The bread hasn’t even landed. Someone leans in with a smile that already knows the answer, and asks: “So… where are you going this summer?”
It is not a question. It is an audit.
Because in this city, where you go is never random - it’s a verdict. Your summer address has a return label, and that label says everything. So we built the map. Find your block. We’ll tell you where you’re really going - and what it says about you, whether you like it or not.
LIVE: Fisher Island & Indian Creek → SUMMER: St. Tropez
The bunker crowd. They don’t pack they “have things sent.” The boat left in May without them; it keeps its own calendar. Lunch at Club 55 that becomes dinner that becomes a minor diplomatic situation. The flex was never about being seen it’s about being unreachable. Phone off. The assistant says “he’s in Europe.” Nobody can confirm which country, and that’s the point.
LIVE: Star Island → SUMMER: Wherever the Boat Happens to Be
For this set, the destination isn’t a place, it’s a question: whose deck? They don’t ask where you’re going. They ask if you’re “doing the Med this year,” as though there is only one Med and you simply haven’t been invited. Meanwhile the Star Island house sits dark, the plants on a drip system, one guy named Carlos holding the only key. The real house is 200 feet long and currently dodging a port tax off Sardinia.
LIVE: North Bay Road, Sunset Islands & Venetian → SUMMER: Ibiza or Aspen
Same waterfront, two completely different ways of lying to yourself about your age. Ibiza is for the ones who refuse to age out - villa in Es Cubells, sunglasses worn indoors, will tell you the DJ “is actually a really close friend.” Aspen is for the ones who swapped the DJ for the Food & Wine Classic, did exactly one hike, and have brought it up unprompted every week since “rosé at altitude just hits different.” Both are flexes. Only one of them requires an IV drip the next morning.
LIVE: Coral Gables → SUMMER: Nantucket & East Hampton
The Gables spent a hundred years engineering itself to look old, so naturally it summers somewhere genuinely old, just to feel seen. Nantucket reds, grey shingles, a rental that’s been in someone else’s family since 1840. The East Hampton contingent wants the establishment and the ocean and will correct you, gently but firmly, if you say “the Hamptons” like it’s all one place. It is not all one place. You’ll be told why.
LIVE: Coconut Grove → SUMMER: The Berkshires & Shelter Island
Sailboats, banyan trees, and at least one man who will explain his catamaran to you in full. The Berkshires set wants Tanglewood, a tote bag, and Yo-Yo Ma with the picnic. The Shelter Island set finds the Hamptons “a bit much” while owning a home there. Old money that reads, will ask what you’re reading, and will visibly recalibrate based on your answer.
