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WHAT’S GOOD MIAMI: 9.1.26
This Week’s Issue
Today's newsletter includes: the Carrot Express rebrand so dumb it fired its own best word, a Virginia Key referendum where both sides claim they're the ones saving Gramps Getaway, the Bass museum bet that says more about Miami Beach's future than any condo tower will, drainage work on 71st Street that's actually good news wearing a bad disguise, the pizza guys behind a national top-three slice ranking opening a spot with no pizza in the Bermuda Triangle, and Pura Vida quietly cutting one location while doubling down on a better one three blocks away.
ON MY MIND: Carrot Express Fired it’s Best Word. Long Live Express.
After three decades, Carrot Express is reintroducing itself as Carrot. According to the press release, they are guiding the rebrand through the core ethos “Feel Natural,” as the brand continues its commitment to defining wellness through simple, real food.
For the record I like Carrot Express. The food is good and I have always perceived it to be a good value. But changing the name to Carrot is a really dumb business idea. Nobody in history has ever said “Carrot Express” and thought they really need to lose that Express. And yet somewhere, in a room, with a whiteboard and an agenda, some brand or design agency convinced the founders that the word “Express” was hurting the brand. That person should be doing something else because that was the dumbest pitch of the year.
A rebrand with 30 locations means new signs at every location. New menus at every location. A trademark filing on the word Carrot, filed in October, still pending, not registered. I ran the search myself. They don’t even own the name yet. A company literally named Carrot, Inc. is trying to trademark the same word. So is a Carrot, LLC. So is a Carrot Group, Inc. Half of corporate America is standing in line for this word right now, and Carrot, the ones who actually renamed their whole company for it, are somewhere in the back of that line.
Say the word “Carrot” alone to anyone and they will not think Carrot Express. They might think of Bugs Bunny, a bag of baby carrots, personally I think the onion dip my mom put out at every party, where the carrot was the spoon. They just made their marketing team’s job 100x harder, their SEO rankings just disappeared. They spent real money trading a word that promised value and speed for nothing. All because a minimalist marketing person convinced them they were building Apple.
Express told you what you were getting. Carrot tells you nothing. That's a demotion with a nicer font.
BEACH BUSINESS
Gramps GetawayGate: Who Really Owns Virginia Key
Gramps could be gone. Or Gramps could be fine. Depends who you ask, and that’s the whole story.
